I do what I want

Well here I am again,  attempting to post more and keep this thing from becoming a tomb of thoughts long past.

Today I am writing about something that always bothers me. People's need to tell others that their opinion/likes/dislikes/whatever are wrong. It's a thing I've noticed for a while but today I felt like talking about it. What brought this up was something a coworker said. Before I get into that, a little background.

A few months back, when my dad was still in the hospital, I let a bit more facial hair than usual grow out. I'll admit I can't grow much of a beard, and it came out looking kind of scraggly, but i decided to do it. At first I was going to let it grow to see how it turned out, but shortly after deciding to do so I found out about my dad's condition. After that I decided that I wasn't going to shave it until things resolved themselves one way or the other. From the reactions I got from guys at work you would think I had committed a capital offense. Every opportunity they had they took to tell me how bad it looked, or how I needed to shave it, or just outright laughter. Now to be fair, during this time I wasn't exactly talking too much to a lot of people about what was going on. I only mentioned it to the one or two people I consider friends and they understood and letbit go. The others though, my goodness. It is amazing how it seems as if other guys try to control the way someone thinks or does things. One day, after about a month or so of this I blew up at a couple of them and told them my reasons. One or two seemed sympathetic but a few others kind of chuckled about it. I believe they were chuckling more about my reaction to them rather than the reasons I gave(at least that's what I choose to believe). Either way they dropped it. When my dad passed I shaved and haven't really thought of it since until today.

So I come into work just a regular day when a dick of a coworker(that has always been my opinion of him not just brought on by this) tells me that he likes the look I have at the moment much better. At first I had no idea what he was talking about as the look I have now I've had for a few years. It seems he was talking about that time period where I let my "beard" grow out. This annoyed me. I explained to him how his opinion didn't actually matter to me, especially when it comes to my looks. Actually when it comes to how I look no guys opinion matters to me. Primarily for two reasons. The first and main one is that I dress for me(yes I realize the irony of that statement coming from a man especially with the next reason). The second is that in the grand scheme of things, the only opinions other than my own I listen to, when it comes to my style, are women's. Now I accept that that might sound misogynistic and for that I apologize, but the truth is I'm straight and therefore sleep with women. Their opinion means more to me; because I feel that even if they have no interest in me, they are still basing their opinion on what they think looks good on a guy(or at least me if they are talking to me about it). There tends to be two reactions from guys to a statement like that. One being "No shit" and the other being "You're whipped". Now by pure coincidence the few male friends I have(about 85% of my friends are female, and don't get me started on how guys treat that tidbit) are of the "No shit" variety. They understand how the opinions of the people you are attracted to are somewhat more relevant than those of people you aren't.

Now I figure that by this point you are probably wondering what that story has to do with the original premise of this post. Let me explain, no that would be too long, let me sum up. It seems that people love to tell you you are wrong in the things you like, or enjoy, or just want to do, if it doesn't line up with their thoughts on those things.

I'll be the first to admit I like a lot of stuff. Whether it's movies, comics, books, music, or people. Because of that I have been accused of liking everything and everyone. While that isn't entirely true the thing I have never understood is what difference does it make. An example, and I know a lot of people will judge me for it, is that I like the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy. Now that you all had the collective gasp, understand that I am aware of it's flaws and have issues with those myself, but the main reason why I like them is that it is Fucking Star Wars. Yes Jar Jar Binks sucked, the droids were idiotic, and some of the acting was sub-par at best but all I care about is that it's Star Wars. The reason I use that as an example is because when I like something/someone I don't think too deeply into why I just know that I do. I know quite a few people who could tell you point for point every single reason they like something, I am not one of them. The main reason for that is that I don't think too deeply about it. Once I have accepted that I like or enjoy something then that is all I need to know. The same applies asbto why I don't like something/someone. Now in those cases I can give all the reasons, mainly because once I realize I don't like something, then I examine why so that I can feel, in my own mind, that it isn't for some arbitrary reason.

I guess what I'm trying to say with all of this rambling talk is that people shouldn't try to control what others like and don't like. Even if you don't agree you should let them have that. I think the main reason people make such a big deal about it is that they want validation for their own thoughts and opinions, and nothing does that better than someone agreeing with you. But you'll be amazed at how much less stress you have when you either stop caring about or trying to control the opinions of others. Now as I said earlier I do make exceptions, but those are the people who have a bigger impact on my life and who my choices actively affect them.

Well that's all for now. I'm aware that I ramble and that a lot of what I said probably won't make sense to people but you know what, I don't care. There's a line from a movie/tv show/ whatever that I think fits perfectly here....."I do what I want"